Monday, August 13, 2012

Hottie Results

As we said “goodbye” to the 2012 London Games, we also said farewell to our favorite sport of all – watching male athletes. As we began these Games with a list of our favorite athletes, we end by giving a roundup of how each of these fine-looking specimens fared in their respective events.

Ryan Lochte

The most decorated of our hotties, with five medals in London, including two gold. However, Lochte was hoping for these to be “his games” and his results, though exceptional, were below the level he was hoping. In his “signature event,” Lochte was a disappointing 3rd. However he beat Phelps in their first meeting, the 400IM, but later was defeated by the winningest Olympian of all time in the 200IM. But unquestionably, Lochte was the face of Olympic hotties in 2012.
2 gold – 400IM, 4x200 Free relay
2 silver – 200IM, 4x100 Free relay
1 bronze – 200 back

James Magnussen

A disappointing Olympics all-around for Aussies in the pool, but particularly for “The Missle,” who was much-hyped in the leadup to London, but came away with just two medals, none of them gold. But at only 21 years old, this hottie should be gracing us with his presence for years to come.
1 silver – 100 free
1 bronze – 4x100 medley

Andreas Thorkildsen

An injury-plagued 2012 did not bode well for Thorkildsen, the gold medalist in both Athens and Beijing, and I’m sorry to report that the Nordic God of Javelin failed to place in the Olympics, finishing 6th in the finals. But after researching him more this morning, I HAVE to give this hottie my gold medal. 

You won the gold in my book, Andreas.

Giuseppe Lanzone 

Participated in only one event, the men’s 8,  where the U.S. just narrowly missed the bronze medal, by .3 seconds.

Sam Mikulak

No one thought the U.S. men would finish the gymnastics without a team medal; even less thought they would leave London with just one medal overall, which was Danell Leyva’s All Around bronze. 

Troy Dumais

The 31-year-old diver finally medaled in his third Olympics, taking bronze in the men’s synchronized 3m springboard. He finished 5th in the individual 3m springboard.

Clemente Russo 

The second-seeded heavyweight boxer lived up to his ranking - Russo made it to the final against Ukraine’s Oleksandr Usyk, where he was defeated, relegating him to the silver medal. The more I looked at him, the more I wonder how a boxer can have a face like this… 

I guess the second-best boxer in the world doesn't get punched in the face too often. Thankfully.


Ricky Berens

Only swam one individual event, where he didn’t make the finals. But Berens was on two relay teams, and medaled in both - including one gold.
                1 gold – 4x200m Freestyle Relay
                1 silver – 4x100m Freestyle relay

Luca Marin

8th place in his only event, the 400m IM, 9.71 behind winner and poll-winning favorite hottie, Ryan Lochte.

Han Van Alphen 

A surprising 4th place in the decathlon. He won the final event, the 1500m, to move into 4th, just 10 seconds shy of the  bronze medal.

Pascal Behrenbruch

A disappointing 10th place in the decathlon.