There are no words...

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Enjoy.

Olympic Heroes and Villains

Okay, so the Olympics are coming to a close. Every Olympics we fall in love with some athletes, and hate others. Here's a list of my favorite athletes, and the athletes I now loathe.

HEROES

Shawn Johnson -- This chick is the cutest thing I've ever seen. You look at her and you can't help but smile, she's so gosh-darn cute. She's all apple cheeks, a little bit of buck teeth, she's 4'9" and she's awesome. These best part is, she is totally kick-ass... she seems like the kind of girl who you would go to the fair with and she'd want to ride the zipper and all of the crazy rides you'd have to pay me to get on, and then she's want to go bungee jumping, and she'd try to convince me to go, but couldn't, then she'd bounce up to the bungee platform, jump down, and bounce back to you after like it was nothing. I <3 her.

Jason Lezak -- The best relay swimmer in American history often goes unnoticed... til you swim a 46.06 final 100 in the 4x100 free to steal the gold medal from the French... reasons Lezak is our hero:
1. He kept Michael Phelps' quest for 8 gold medals alive; we all know that is what would have been the real tragedy if the US had lost the gold medal. But, this dude totally put his team on his back, swam them out of a hole, and because of HIM they won the gold and set the world record in probably the best swimming race ever.
2. He beat the French guy. Okay, so we all know the French are pretty much all a-holes (yes, I'm incredibly PC today), but this Alain Bernard guy kind of takes it to another level. He talked a ton of smack about how the French were going to "smash" the Americans, making himself an instant villain, plus he has a wicked hot body, but his pin head looks like it is photoshopped onto it. They totally don't go together, it's super freaky.
3. In his 3rd Olympics, he finally won an individual medal - a bronze medal in the 100-meter free. Previously, Lezak had 5 relay medals, including 3 gold, but no medals on his own. We all wanted Phelps to win the race (come on, you know you did), but I think we were all cheering just as hard for Lezak to take home the silver or bronze... and I don't think I've ever seen anyone so happy to come in 3rd.
4. At 32, he is the oldest man to ever qualify for an Olympic swim team. Sure, at 41 Dara Torres makes him look like a toddler, but it's still pretty awesome.

speaking of...
Dara Torres -- at 41, just making the Olympics was an amazing feat... but Torres won individual silver in the 50 free, then just SEVEN MINUTES after standing on the podium, anchored the US women to a silver in the 4x100 free. This lady is kick-ass. (please don't let her be on drugs, please don't let her be on drugs, please don't let her be on drugs...)

Jonathan Horton -- Kid was the best US men's gymnast bar-none, and had the best competition of his life at the Olympics. He took the team on his back and stuck 6-of-6 routines in the team competition to give the Americans a suprise bronze. Then, on the last day of competition, he threw two new elements into his high bar routine because he didn't just want to make a good showing in the event finals, he wanted to compete for a medal. It paid off, and he won the silver.


VILLAINS

Usain Bolt -- Okay, so if you haven't yet seen the 200 meter final, DO NOT READ THE REST OF THIS PARAGRAPH. That's my disclaimer.
Now: why Usain Bolt is evil.
1. He is 21 years old. If he is legit this good at 21, he makes me sick.
2. He won the gold and broke the WR in the 100 meter dash, and he slowed down at the end to celebrate. I don't care that he celebrated, if I was the world's fastest man I'd be doing backflips down the track and telling everyone else in the world to suck it, but come on man... finish the race.
3. He broke Michael Johnson's World Record in the 200 meters. That is literal track blasphemy.

Milo Cavic -- I have a few reasons to dislike Mr. Cavic.
1. He was born in America, yet swims for Serbia. I mean his parents are from there and all, but he grew up here, went to college here, then he swims a medal for Serbia? What, you didn't think you were good enough to make the American team or something?
But that's not the worst part...
2. Cavic decided that he spoke for the world when he said that it would be good for swimming in Phelps lost a race. Ummm Milo, good for swimming or good for you? Yeah, that's what I thought. I love when athletes no one has ever heard of open their mouths to bash the stars, so that their names are in the papers too. Whatever dude. He put up a great showing in the 100M fly, barely losing to Phelps, but then he started complaining like a bitch that he had actually won, and the results were wrong, blah blah. Get over it dude, you lost. It wasn't better for anyone except YOU if Phelps lost. Oh, and now you're the a-hole who talking smack about America's hero. WAY TO GO JERK

CHINA -- Yeah, they put on a good Opening Ceremonies, and the water cube and bird's nest are fricken awesome... but this country needs a serious reality check.
1. Smog -- seriously, that shit is nasty. "But it isn't like that every day." That's something to be proud of? Once every three days you can see more than 100 yards in front of you? It's disgusting. The best male marathoner in the world, Haile Gebrselassie, won't even run it there because he's afraid of what it will do to his lungs. Um, don't you think that's a problem China? Seriously, over a billion people and you can't figure out how to clean?
2. Communism - seriously? So the US won't trade with Cuba, and we can't go to Cuba, but we're free to go to China, and most of our crap is made there... double standard much? US Speedskater Joey Cheek, the founder of Team Darfur, had his visa "mysteriously" revoked just hours before he was supposed to go to Beijing to try to urge China, an economic partner of Sudan, to help make peace in Sudan's war-torn Darfur region. How is this possible in 2008?
3. No freedom of speech -- International journalists aren't allowed onto any websites that mention the massacre at Tiananmen Square, or anything that puts the Chinese government in a bad light. Nothing to do with the Dalai Lama is allowed. The Chinese promised before they were awarded the games that they would give 100% freedom to the press. LIARS.
4. Chinese athletes -- now, before you read this and think I'm racist or something, please let me explain: I feel SO sorry for Chinese athletes. Especially gymnasts. The kids are taken from their families when they're like 4 years old, and basically are turned into strong, flipping robots. Their families are given a home and the knowledge that their child is doing good for China. Then the kids see their families maybe once a year. They train like 8 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year. You never see beaming Chinese parents in the stands, because they don't even know their own children. It's basically child abuse and it makes me sick.
...There are probably 100 other reasons China is a villian in these Olympics, and I don't even mean how He Kexin stole the uneven bars gold medal from Nastia Liukin.

That's all I can think of now... definitely let me know who you think I missed and why!

A picture you may want to look at...

Michael Phelps and Brady Quinn... I <3 them both, but seriously, can you imagine their conversations? Please boys, stop talking. Just stand on each side of me and look pretty. Oh, and fan me with your money.

Yeah, I cry at sports. Deal with it.

I have something embarassing to admit... sometimes, I cry at sports.

Okay, when I say "sometimes" I kind of mean all of the time.

But give me a break, I know I'm a "tomboy" when it comes to knowing a lot about sports, but when it comes to everything else, I'm pretty girly - I love chick flicks, I cry at TV, I love getting a good mani/pedi, I like to cook, and I rarely leave the house without ironing my clothes.

So yeah, I cry at sports. Those "make a wish" segments on ESPN kill me. And I guess I'm the sucker NBC is gearing towards to, cause the stories on Lopez Lomong, etc., cause me to well up. I cry whenever I see what a win really means to someone... because it's not even about sport, its about accomplishing something they have worked their entire lives to. And I cry when someone loses something they have worked their entire lives for.

These Olympics have been no exception.

I have watched gymnastics ever since I can remember, I even tried gymnastics for a few years until I realized I was way too tall, and hadn't started at 4, so any Olympic asperations I may have had were to stay in my dreams. But I still love watching gymnastics, more amazed each year at what the young girls can do.

On Tuesday, I watched Massachusetts' own Alicia Sacramone fall of the beam and then fall on the floor, destroying her Olympic ideals. My eyes welled up with hers, knowing that she had hurt her team, and after years of spending 6 days a week, 6 hours a day in the gym, it all came down to a couple of falls.

In the all-around, America's hopes were tightly in the hands of 4'9 Shawn Johnson, and slightly behind her was Nastia Liukin, the Moscow-born, Texas bred daughter of an Olympic gold medal gymnast. Johnson's mid-west attitude, chipmunk cheeks and toothy grin scream "America's darling," while the more cold Liukin lurked in the background. For some reason, I was pulling for the calm and cool Liukin.

Definitely what would be considered an ice princess, Liukin is all business, and all beauty. Watching Johnson, she is simply missing something that Liukin has. Liukin gained her strength from her father, a 1988 gold medalist for the Soviet Union, but she got her beauty and grace from her mother, a World Champion rhythmic gymnast (yeah, I don't think its a sport but it's still pretty). Luikin's lines are impeccable, and her longer, less muscular body is just a lot prettier to watch that Johnson's tiny muscular stout body.

So when Liukin walked onto the floor needing barely a 14.8 to take the gold, I got chills. When she finished a gorgeous routine and all but secured the gold, I started to feel tears in my eyes.

When the routines were done, and the places were secure, Liukin finally broke into a smile for the first time in the entire competition. And when she hugged her father, now with the bond of an Olympic gold between them, and stood on the medal stand and finally showed real emotion - holding back the tears, - I knew I was alone in my bed and didn't have to show the same strength.

Saturday night when Phelps won his 8th gold, I cried as though I was his mother, so proud that he hasn't let the hype or the pressure overtake him. It makes me especially proud that he really seems to know what it means, and he doesn't take it for granted.

This year alone, I cried when the Red Sox won the World Series, when the Celtics won the Championship, and when Patriots lost. I cry when Bob Costas tells his stories about amazing athletes, and when Bryant Gumble tells the story of the treatment of racehorses.

Sometimes I feel like a wuss when I'm crying at sports. But then I remember that I could kick your ass at fantasy football, and I could tell most guys a thing or two about a cover-two. So there.

In awe of Phelps

These are Michael Phelps' Olympics, and everyone else just happens to be there.

Through 5 events, Phelps has 5 gold medals, and 5 World Records. Oh yeah, and his total gold medal count now stands at 11, the most ever by an athlete in the Olympics.

And yet, even though this was expected of him, this dominance was almost a given, we are still in awe.

We are in awe of the man-fish, who, swimming against the best swimmers in the world, won the 200 meter freestyle by over two seconds, and broke the world record by more than a full second.

Even in his "questionable" race, meaning, not the one that he wasn't great at, but the one that had swimmers that were seemingly capable of beating him, it simply wasn't so -- Phelps won the gold by more than two seconds, with the man who everyone thought had a chance to beat him, teammate Ryan Lochte, fading to third, more than four seconds behind Phelps.

Much has been talked about Phelps and his natural abilities - his 6'4 frame, his abnormally long torso which is that of a man 6'8", and his shorter legs, which therefore create less drag in the water, with his core being lower in his body, more like that of a fish. His size 14 feet resemble flippers, he has a 6'7" wingspan, and is double jointed. Somehow his body creates about 1/2 the lactic acid of other world-class athletes, which prevents his muscles from tiring and cramping when others would. But, despite the physical attributes that make him almost born to spend much of his life in the water, it is Phelps' drive and determination that have made him the best Olympian ever. And he's not done yet.

Phelps' is Jordan-eque in his hatred of losing; he is Roger Clemens-esque in the intensity of his workouts (minus the 'roids)... he doesn't seem to hate killer workouts or putting his personal life on hold to concentrate on his ultimate goal.

He must consume between 8,000 and 10,000 calories a day just to make up for how hard he trains... and he has 2% body fat.

And to prove to the world that he isn't cheating, that it is God-given ability and hard-as-heck training that has made him the champion that he is, Phelps' volunteered for rigorous drug testing during the Olympics, being tested at LEAST once a day.

And I think one of the things that draws us into Phelps, besides his 6'4" perfect frame, is that he is like a kid when he gets each and every gold medal around his neck - smiling and taking it in, not like the Chinese robots who look solemn, and almost relieved, to get their gold.

So even though we expected this of Phelps, it is still fun to watch, we all still cheer him on each and every race, almost like we do Tiger Woods. They are two of the few Goliath-like athletes that the world cheers for against the underdog Davids of the sporting world. And that is because each time we see Phelps or Woods competing, we KNOW that we are watching history, the best to ever do their sport, and that is exciting, and awe-inspiring.


Oh, and for those of you keeping up, who want to see history live, here are Phelps' remaining races:
• Race No. 6 -- 200 individual medley: Friday morning Beijing time, Thursday night in the U.S.

• Race No. 7 -- 100 butterfly: Saturday morning Beijing time, Friday night in the U.S.

• Race No. 8 -- 4x100 medley relay: Sunday morning Beijing time, Saturday night in the U.S.


Finally, for your viewing pleasure...